How Did We Get Here?
by keeponsmilingg
Summary: What was once a dream, turned into a nightmare. Sam and Mercedes were happy once; how did they get here?
1. Chapter 1

"Mom! This isn't right; you need to talk to him!"

_When it came down to physical appearance, my 16 year old daughter, Alexis Evans, took after Sam. She was tall and slender, standing at 5'8". She had inherited his best features. Alexis had beautiful blue eyes and pouty lips. On the other hand, she got her attitude from me. She was fierce, confident, and no one could stand in her way. When she believed in something, she fought for it. And this just happened to be one of those moments._

"Don't act like I'm not in the room! I said no, and that's final Alexis. This discussion is _**over**__._"

_At the age of 38, Sam had managed to get sexier with age. His shaggy & boyish blonde hair was now shorter. He had definitely matured. Don't get me started about his body. After all of these years, he still managed to catch my breath. It was weird because Sam hadn't changed, but at the same time, he was a stranger. He went from this dorky teenager with this never ending smile, to a man whose face had hardened with darkness. _

"Now wait a minute! Sam, this conversation is not over. We need to talk this through. We don't make decisions like this in our house."

_When I was 17, being married to Sam and having a child with him seemed like a fairytale. No, it was more of a dream to me. Now at 37, it was far from a dream. It was a reality that wasn't living up to its fairytale potential. _

Sam was looking at me like I'd stabbed him in the back; his eyes were piercing right through me. Chills rushed up and down my neck. Alexis smirked as she was happy with this tiny glimpse of hope.

"Mom's right Dad! What happened to _hearing_ me out? What happened to compromising with me," she asked her father with a pleading look on her face.

Usually with a quivering lip and her wide eyes, Alexis could easily persuade Sam to do anything. This was a skill she had learned from me. Only this time, it didn't look like he was falling for it.

"Listen to me Alexis. I _compromised_ when you wanted to go on a skiing trip without chaperones. I _compromised _when you wanted a nose ring. I even _compromised_ when you wanted a new car. But when it comes to this, I'm not compromising! I'm not changing my mind." Sam was trying not to lose his cool, but I could see his blood boiling.

"Ok to be fair, I paid for half of that _gently used_ car…" Alexis replied sarcastically.

Before Sam had time to say anything, I knew it was time for me to step in.

"Go to your room sweetie, this has now become a conversation between me and your father." I said calmly.

"No! I want to understand why he won't let me go out with Darren! It's not fair, Mom." She sneered.

"Listen to your mother and get to your room Alexis." Sam grumbled without looking at either at us.

"It's because he's **black** isn't?" she challenged her father with such a ridiculous accusation. Did I mention she doesn't go down without a fight?

Sam stood angrily almost knocking over the chair he was sitting in.

"The discussion is over Alexis. Go now!" He pointed in the direction of the hallway where her room was.

Defeated, my young daughter looked to me for help. Instead, I just nodded my head towards her bedroom door.

Realizing she had not won the battle, she stormed to her room, slamming the door.

Sam laughed and sarcastically asked, "Since when was slamming doors acceptable in this house?"

Fed up with his attitude, I finally lashed out.

"What the _hell_, Sam! What is wrong with you? She's a good kid! She makes good grades, she helps around the house. Why do you have to be such an _**asshole**_about this?" I couldn't hold in my feelings any longer.

"I'm the bad guy now? Right, so I'm an _**asshole**_ because I care about my daughter. I'm an _**asshole**_ because I don't want some _thug's_ hands all over my little girl," he said trying to challenge me.

"Darren is a good kid. He's in honor classes with Alexis; he's involved with the church! Maybe if you went more often, you would know that." I challenged him right back.

He looked at me with eyes I couldn't read. Then he just rolled his eyes and scoffed. Who was this man sitting before me? It was like I didn't know him anymore.

We sat in silence for a few moments before I sighed.

"This is about way more than our daughter's love life. I feel like I don't know who you are anymore Sam," I barely whispered. I looked up at him with tears brimming in my eyes while he avoided my stare.

"All we do is fight. You have this hot temper that came out of nowhere. Nothing's fun for you. If you aren't mad, you're tired. If you're not tired, you want to be alone. You're slipping away from me," I said not being able to hold in my tears anymore.

He looked up at me with such an angry face that it was almost scary.

"Cedes…," he paused for a moment. "Did it ever cross your mind, that maybe it's you that's the problem?"

Taken aback, a lump was caught in my throat. For one of the first moments in my life, I was speechless.

"You know, maybe if you were around more, _you would know_ that it's you that has changed."

I couldn't believe what he was saying. I was so out of it, I almost didn't notice him walk over to the kitchen to get his keys.

"Where the hell are you going this time Sam? We can't leave it like this; not again." My voice was raspy and shaky. This scene was all too familiar. I tried to pull his arm, but he jerked away.

"I need air. Don't wait up," he said simply as he slammed the front door. And with that he left for the second time this month.

It took almost all of me to not break down right there in our living room.

What was happening to our lives? How did we get here?

**A/N: Hey Everyone! This is my first story and I hope you enjoyed the first chapter. I really wanted to see more Samcedes Fanfiction, so I thought, "why not write your own?" So I did! Reviews would be amazing. I see a lot of fanfiction originating from the Prom Queen episode, and I wanted to try a new approach. Not that I don't love those stories! Anyway, thanks for reading. **


	2. Chapter 2

So! Firstly, thanks so much for the reviews. I was so happy to see that you all liked it. Secondly, I just realized that the title, "How Did We Get Here?", is a line from the Paramore song "Decode." But it's not a song fic! At least, I didn't plan for it to be. But there will be music later on. It's Glee!

Disclaimer: Glee is not mine, but I wish Chord, Mark, Kevin, Chris, Harry, & Cory were all mine ;)

**My eyes were red and puffy. I had cried myself to sleep again. My throat was killing me and I looked like **_**hell**_**. When I woke up, I was relieved and pissed at the same time. I had rolled over to see Sam sleeping beside me. Like always, he had come back in the middle of the night without saying a word. I couldn't help but to think, what if he didn't come back next time? Would there even be a next time? **

**After staring at my reflection for what seemed like hours, I decided to take a warm bath. As relaxing as a bath should have been, it was the opposite. I had so much on my mind that I couldn't think straight. And although I should have been worried about work, and the bills, and Alexis' future plans, I wasn't. I just wanted to fix my marriage, which was hanging on by a thread. **

It wasn't too long ago that we'd graduated from McKinley; the Class of 2012. Okay so maybe fifteen plus years was a long time ago, but I remembered high school like it was yesterday.

I had always thought Sam was cute and funny, but after Junior Prom, we started to see one another in a brand new light. Soon enough, we were dating, and life couldn't get any better.

Sam was more than a high school crush. He was my boyfriend and my best friend. He understood me like no one else and made me feel like a queen. He was such a dork, but I accepted his love for Avatar and Harry Potter. Even with his financial issues, he found a way to sweep me off my feet. Sam didn't have to buy my love. He gave me the best gift of all: his heart. Together, we were unstoppable. It was us against the world.

By the time senior year rolled around, all of the seniors in Glee club were working hard to make something of our lives. Kurt and Rachel were the first to win their golden tickets out of our small town. In the fall, they'd be pursuing their Broadway dreams in New York. They both got into the Tisch School of the Arts at NYU; it wasn't a surprise to anyone.

They weren't the only ones that were getting away from Lima. Finn moved to Indiana to study music at Valparaiso University. Quinn was admitted to Kenyon College in Ohio. Puck started out at the community college in Lima, but he eventually transferred to Ohio State with Artie. Santana moved to Miami to pursue a career in the fashion industry. Brittany, not surprising us at all, went to Europe to travel and never looked back. Somehow, we knew she'd end up okay though. Zizes moved to Michigan, but we never knew if she ended up at school. Mike went to James Madison University in Virginia to study Dance. He was so good; he should have been teaching the courses instead of taking them. Tina ended up at the University of Chicago, one of the best schools in the Midwest.

As for me, I had planned to go to Ohio State University too, with Sam. But when Northwestern came knocking at my door with a scholarship for their Performing Arts program, I was faced with a dilemma. I had no problem leaving Lima, but I had a huge problem with leaving Sam.

We were determined to make our relationship work, even if we were 6 hours apart. In the beginning, our long distance relationship was working better than we expected. We did everything from late night phone calls, Skyping, emails, texts, to sending old fashioned love letters. I even visited him one weekend at OSU to see a football game. But when our schedules started to clash, it got harder to call Sam my boyfriend and truly believe it.

When I was sure our relationship was over, Sam transferred to the University of Illinois at Chicago to be closer to me. Everything felt like it was finally coming together. By the time we were seniors in college, we were more in love than ever. We were ready to face anything together, well except for one thing.

"_Cedes, this place is a mess. How are we supposed to host people for a party tomorrow," Sam asked me. _

"_We can always use the piles of clothes on the floor as extra seating," I said jokingly. Sam wasn't amused. Tomorrow, we'd be hosting a graduation party in our small town house and Sam wanted to make a good impression._

"_Honey, calm down. It's going to be fine. We only invited 30 of our closest friends," I joked with him. _

_He couldn't help but smile at me. I walked over to join him on the couch and kissed him sweetly. Tomorrow, he was going to be graduating from UIC with a Bachelor of Arts Degree in Art & Design with a minor in English. I was so proud of him; he worked so hard to graduate the year he was supposed to. Which was why he deserved to know the truth, and now was the perfect time to tell him._

"_So, I got you a gift," I said excitedly while handing him a card and his present wrapped perfectly. He was grinning from ear to ear._

"_I thought we agreed on not exchanging gifts for this. You didn't have to do this. Thank you babe," he said kissing me on the cheek. He wouldn't be so thankful after he found out._

"_Open the card first!" This was it; my heart was going to leap out of my chest. _

_Smiling, he read the card aloud._

"_Dear Sam,_

_I'm so proud of what you've accomplished. Who knew my white boy was such a genius? Just kidding, I always knew. This journey we've gone through has been incredible, and I can't wait to start the next chapter of our lives together. Congratulations on your graduation. Oh and by the way, I didn't have time to look up the word "love" in the Na'vi translator, but just keep in mind that I love you, forever and always._

_From the two that love you the most,_

_Mercedes & Alexis?"_

_Sam was beyond confused._

"_Who is Alexis….Wait, you don't think that I cheated on you or anything did you? I have no idea who Alexis is. Whatever she is saying is all lies. I promise," Sam looked like he was going to cry._

_Even though I wanted to relieve him from his worries, I couldn't seem to say anything. I felt like I was going to throw up, for more than one reason. I just sat there staring at him, speechless. He was going out of his mind._

"_Mercedes! Can you please tell me what's going on?" His eyes were pleading for answers._

"_I'm pregnant Sam," I whispered softly. _

_The tension was insane. No one was talking. I hadn't even realized I was crying until Sam said something._

"_Oh Cedes, don't cry! I didn't mean to make you cry. Come here." He snuggled up to me, taking me in his arms. _

"_I'm sorry I didn't say anything, I was just so shocked," he said looking me right in the eye._

"_Listen to me, how many times have we had obstacles in this relationship?" I couldn't tell if he was actually confident, or just trying really hard to be._

"_We've been through quite a few," I said while wiping my tears. _

"_Exactly. Baby, I'm in this with you for life," he said taking my hands, "I'm going to be here for you and our child." He was looking my stomach._

"_I'm sorry I didn't let you know earlier. I just wanted to be sure," I paused._

"_So, you're not freaking out or anything? This is like every guy's worst nightmare!" I was surprised he hadn't passed out already._

"_Oh trust me, I'm freaking out. I'm surprised I haven't passed out yet. I'm sure I will. But, I'm not every guy Mercedes. We're going to get through this." How did I end up with such a great guy? I threw my arms around him and kissed him passionately._

"_Whoa, slow down! This is how we got into this situation in the first place," he smirked. But then his face went from happy to confusion._

"_Mercedes, you never told me who Alexis was," he pointed out. A big smile spread across my face._

"_Well, ever since I was a little girl, I already had my baby names picked out. I always wanted my first child to be a girl named Alexis. What do you think?"_

"_I think it's perfect."_

**Snapping out of my flashback, the soft knock on the door startled me. I hesitated to answer. I wasn't quite sure I was ready to face what was on the other side of that door. **

A/N: I hope you all enjoyed this second chapter. I am slowly revealing background details. How did you feel about it? I felt like you all should know what happened to the Glee club after high school! I know the pregnancy reveal is sometimes overdone, but I hope mine was entertaining! So, who do you think is knocking on the door? What do they want? Mercedes needs to get out of the tub before her skin gets wrinkly haha. Reviews as always are appreciated. Thanks again for the good response to the story so far!


	3. Chapter 3

**Thanks so much for being patient with me! I've procrastinated so much the past few days. To make up for it, I'm posting two chapters :] Let's get this story going! **

**Disclaimer: No Glee ownership here :[ **

"_Mom, it's me. Can I come in?"_

"_I'll be out in a second honey."_

**It was rare that I had time to myself. Life had been so hectic lately. My job had taken over my life. Hell, my job was my life. When I graduated from Northwestern, I had a Bachelor of Arts Degree in Music and a Teaching Licensure in Music Education. I was so eager to share my passion with children. I would never stop being a diva, but teaching was so exhilarating. **

**As crazy as it sounds, Sam and I moved back to Ohio after graduation. We moved to Decatur, which was about 30 miles outside of Lima. I took a year off to raise Alexis, but after my break I got right to work. I started out teaching chorus at the local high school in Decatur. Being at this school was all sorts of déjà vu. The sports programs were at the top of the food chain, and the arts were an endangered species. Channeling my inner Mr. Shuester, I fought the hardest for those kids. When my efforts weren't enough, the school cut the arts program. I was not going down without a fight. If Mr. Shue hadn't fought for us, where would we be?**

**I went into battle mode. I gathered a team of powerful individuals in the city who believed in the arts just as much as I did. After almost a year of fundraising, applying for grants, building a qualified staff, buying land, hiring architects, working with construction, and compromising with the school board, my team had accomplished the impossible. **

**In the fall of 2018, the Decatur School of the Arts opened. Cameras were flashing and music was playing as I cut the ribbon. My closest friends were cheering me on while Sam & Alexis stood by my side. The school was amazing. It was a state-of-the-art performance facility with classrooms filled with the latest technology and the best instruments. We had performance halls for all of the performing groups; there was even a black box theatre. It was everything I had dreamed of and more.** **When I started out at the school, I was just a teacher. But then everyone insisted that I take the Decatur City Public Schools Administrator of the Arts position when it was offered to me. I was in charge of all of the arts programs for the entire city. It was a lot of work, but I couldn't have asked for a better job. **

When I went into my room, Alexis was sitting on my bed. Sam was gone.

"Why are you still undressed? You're going to be late for school!" I said to my daughter. Alexis looked exhausted.

"Sorry Mom, I overslept. I couldn't sleep at all last night. When I finally got tired enough to go to sleep, it was time for me to wake up. I just couldn't get out of bed," she said groggily.

Before I could respond, she started again.

"Mom, I heard Dad leave again last night, and I'm sorry. I promise I'll stop asking to see Darren. I'll help out more around the house. I'll even try to get more shifts at work to stay out of the house. I'm…just really sorry. I hate it when you two fight because of _me_," Alexis said quietly looking away from me.

My heart broke into a million pieces. I hadn't even thought about how this was affecting her.

"Alexis Stacey Evans, look at me. Now your father and I might argue sometimes, but not because of you. We love you so much and we couldn't be more proud of you. Don't ever forget that okay?" Alexis nodded slightly giving me a lopsided smile. My heart melted. Whenever she smiled, it reminded me of Sam so much.

"Now go get ready! You're probably going to run into a ton of traffic at this time," I scolded.

"About that…see that's why I'm here. I kind of need a ride to school."

"And what is preventing you from driving your _own_ car?"

"Well, you know how I was supposed to fill up my tank? Well, on the way to the gas station, I decided to stop by the mall. You never know what good sales are going on Mom. Anyway, so I saw them. I saw these cute shoes and I had to buy them! I just can't go around not looking fabulous."

One thing Alexis was and always has been was honest. How could I argue with that? As a fierce diva myself, I understood the priority of looking good.

"Just go get ready. Oh and by any chance did you see your Dad before he left," I asked hopefully.

"Yea, I saw him leaving as I was coming upstairs. He told me, to tell you, that he had to go to the store to take care of business, and that he'll be back later. Oh and that also reminds me, check your phone. It kept lighting up like crazy when you were in the bathroom. Well mom, time to go make myself look beautiful," and with that she was out the door.

I walked over to my phone hoping to see messages from Sam. My face lit up when I saw 3 missed calls from Kurt, 1 missed call from Blaine, and a text from Kurt saying "DIVA, Sorry to call so early, but I have to talk to you ASAP."

I was so excited that Kurt had called me, but I was surprised. Kurt and I had stayed close over the years. Both him and Blaine were Alexis's godparents. But between my work at the school, and his Broadway career, it was hard to see each other. I wondered what he needed to talk to me about.

**A/N: Woo! So, this took forever to write, but it's not the longest chapter. I guess that's just how it works sometimes. So firstly, Aw! Alexis thought she was the cause of the fight. Poor Girl! And Kurt's calling. I wonder what he could want? Read the next chapter and you'll find out. Thanks again for the reviews and adding this to your favorites/story alerts! **


	4. Chapter 4

**Here we go, second chapter of the night! This chapter doesn't include many flashbacks, mostly dialogue! Pay attention to the A/N at the end please, and thank you all for reading!**

**I don't own Glee, but I do own the TV that I watch Glee on. It's as close as I can get :P **

"FINALLY! Where have you been? I've been trying to reach you all morning? You and Sammy weren't getting it on were you…? If so, I'm sorry, but this is more important," Kurt rambled into the phone. I could tell how happy he was; I missed him so much.

"Hi best friend! I'm fine, thanks for asking!" I replied sarcastically.

"Sorry! I was going to get to that eventually. I'm just so happy to hear your voice. I have so much to tell you in a short amount of time!"

"Why, what's going on?"

"I'm in the airport about to take a flight home. Surprise! _Oh hush honey, _Blaine says hello by the way."

"Hi Blaine! Wait, coming home? What for?"

"What for? Did you not get your invite in the mail? How could Finn forget you? Remind me to scold him when I get home."

"Invite? I'm so confused! Can you explain to me what is going on?"

"You haven't heard? I thought word traveled fast in Ohio. Well anyway, Mr. Shuester is finally retiring from teaching. Finn and some of the others have planned a surprise _New Directions_ reunion showcase to celebrate! Are you sure the invite isn't in the mail?"

"I don't know; I'll have to check to see! Wow, this is so exciting and such a great idea. I can't wait to see everyone. This will definitely keep my mind off of things."

"Mercedes, honey, are you okay? I hope you're not working yourself to death." Even when he was miles away, he always had a way of seeing through me.

"No, no I'm fine. Listen, thanks for calling me! It was so great to hear from you. Have a safe flight and I'll see you soon." I guess he didn't have time to argue. He surprisingly let me off easy.

"Alright love! Wait, I can't believe I almost forgot. Guess what?"

"It's too early to play the guessing game! Spill it!"

"Blaine & I are adopting a baby!" He squealed and I heard Blaine chuckle.

"What? No way! Shut up! Oh I so call baby's godmother."

"Of course! But hey, our flight is finally boarding. I'll call you when we land. I love you sweetie!"

"Bye Kurt," I said before ending the phone call. I was so happy for Kurt. A baby, and a New Directions reunion, this couldn't come at a better time. Even after last night, all I wanted to do was tell Sam.

After getting back from taking Alexis to school, I was so anxious to check the mail.

"Ugh, bills, ads, more bills, junk, Baked Goods Catalog? Ah, here it is!"

We had received the invitation, Finn hadn't forgotten about us. It was addressed to Mr. and Mrs. Sam Evans. Seeing our names written like that made my heart warm.

When I opened the invitation, a handwritten note had fallen out.

"Sam & Mercedes,

I hope you all are doing well. Some of us have been working hard to put together

a New Directions Reunion Special Surprise for Mr. Shuester's retirement.

We hope you'll both be there at the first rehearsal. Wear clothes you can dance in! The invitation

has all of the information.

Talk to you soon, Finn."

I was filled with glee. The New Directions hadn't performed together since our graduation. This was exactly what I needed right now.

When I went up to the room, Sam was back. He was sitting at his desk with his shirt off. Moments like this made me wish it was warm all year round.

"Good morning baby," he said awkwardly.

"Good morning Sam," I said politely, going over to my closet to pick out today's outfit.

It was tense in the room. I could have gone off on him for leaving last night, but I just didn't have the strength. Plus, I had a ton of meetings that day. I didn't need to stress myself.

"Listen, I need to talk to you," he said hesitantly.

I turned around to face him. He looked serious and I was freaking out inside. This was it. He was going to ask for a divorce. 16 years of marriage down the drain.

He sat down on the bed and patted his hand on the spot next to him. I sat down cautiously. My eyes started to well up.

"I'm sorry. I shouldn't have left last night," he started out with. I wasn't sure where he was going with this, but it was a lot better than hearing "I'm leaving you."

"Things have been so tense with us lately; I just needed to clear my head. But that doesn't make it right. I shouldn't have left it that way and I'm sorry." He looked sincere, which was a relief.

"I'm sorry too. Everything's been so hectic with work and everything," I said.

"I know. Trust me, I know. But, Mercedes…I think we should talk to someone…about us. About our situation." Was he seriously suggesting that we go into therapy?

"Are you seriously suggesting that we go into therapy? Sam! We can get through this on our own. We don't need a stranger telling us about our marriage." I was furious.

"There wouldn't be any shame to it Mercedes. I think we need someone on the outside to help us out. This is about more than our marriage, and…you know that," he said looking down. I felt light headed, and I wanted to throw up.

"Ever since…," he started, but I had to cut him off.

"Look what came in the mail today! It's from Finn. He's been working on a New Directions reunion for Mr. Shuester. He's retiring!" I immediately changed the subject. Even though he looked disappointed, he seemed to let it go and took the invite in his hands.

"Wow, this sounds amazing. But Mercedes we should really talk about-"

"And guess who called me today?" I said, once again changing the subject.

"I don't know, who," he sighed, clearly not happy with my eagerness to let the subject go.

"Kurt! He called to tell me he'd be coming back home for the reunion, and that him and Blaine are adopting a baby. I already volunteered us to be the godparents," I explained excitedly.

"That's really great. Honey…"

"We're going to RSVP to the reunion right? We haven't seen the entire Glee club together since we graduated."

"Mercedes listen to me," he said taking my hand and bringing me down to earth.

"I don't really think we should be going to this reunion. I think we need to focus on the issue here." He was not going down without a fight.

"We can't skip out on this Sam. I know you want to see everyone just as much as I do," I was pouting.

"If you promise to go to one therapy session with me, then I'll consider it." He offered.

Damn, he really wasn't going to go down without a fight. I couldn't let this opportunity go though. I had to compromise.

"Fine, I'll consider going to therapy if you consider us going to the reunion," I said hoping he would take it. After thinking it over, we made a deal.

"Thanks Sam. Well, I should probably get ready. I need to go into the office," I said disappointingly. I enjoyed talking to him when I had the chance. Even if it was for a little bit.

"Yea, I should probably get ready for the day," he said getting up and pulling me with him. We were now face to face inches apart.

Looking into his eyes, I fell in love all over again. Sam and I were going to be okay. He took me by surprise and kissed me passionately but slow. Those lips were a work of art.

When he pulled back, it was too soon. I felt like we were teenagers again.

"What was that for?" Not that I minded at all.

"I love you Mercedes. I don't want you to ever forget that. We'll get through this, okay?"

"I love you too Sam."

"Forever"

"And always."

We kissed again and said our goodbyes as we went back into the real world. I just hoped Sam was right about getting through this.

**A/N: Alright, so a couple of things. First of all, how did everyone like both chapters? New Directions reunion! Ohhh yea! Kurt and Blaine are still together and adopting a baby! Mercedes and Sam finally talk (and slightly make out). How did everyone feel about this? Why is Mercedes so hesitant about going to see a therapist? Since the Glee club is coming back soon, I want some suggestions on what they've been up to. If you have ideas about what a certain character should be doing with their lives, let me know! **

**Secondly, I have an idea for a new story. I was going to wait until I was done with this one, but I don't know when that will be! So, I think I'm going to start writing tonight and have it up tomorrow hopefully. Don't worry, in no means am I abandoning this story. **

**Finally, if you have a Tumblr, send me your links through message, or you can follow me! My link is on my profile page. I'll follow back.**

**Reviews are wanted! I really want to know how you all are feeling about the story. There is more drama on the way! **


	5. Chapter 5

**I've been overwhelmed by all of the positive feedback on this story. Thank you all so much! I'm getting kind of nervous because I'm now afraid to disappoint you all ha-ha. Check the author's note at the end. Once again, send me your Tumblr URLs so I can follow you :]**

"Sam, this office gives me the creeps."

I couldn't believe I had been dragged to therapy. Sam insisted on calling it "marriage counseling." It was therapy in my eyes.

"Stop complaining. C'mon, don't make this a bad experience before it already starts. I think we'll get something out of this," Sam said squeezing my hand. I resisted the urge to roll my eyes. Just before I could say something, the door opened.

In walked a middle-aged man wearing dark rimmed glasses. He had short brown hair with hints of grey starting to show. He smiled politely and stuck his hand out to greet us.

"You must be Mr. and Mrs. Evans. Hi, I'm Dr. Cross; it's great to meet you both."

"My name is Sam and this is Mercedes," Sam spoke up first as I tried to hide the fact that I was anything but comfortable.

"We want to thank you for seeing us and putting us on your schedule on such a short notice," I said as Sam smiled at me.

"I appreciate your call. This might sound cliché, but the first step is admitting that there is an issue."

Dr. Cross seemed like a nice man, but I wasn't ready to open up to a total stranger. I don't think I'd ever be ready.

"But I must admit, when I think of marriage counseling, I picture hostile couples ready to destroy one another. You two seem very much in love," the doctor observed. He looked down to see that we were holding hands.

"I still love her, that's never going to change," Sam said looking at me.

"But, we went through a rough patch and we never dealt with it. We don't talk about it at all. I think it's slowly but surely coming back to haunt us," he was now facing Dr. Cross.

"Everyone has a different way of dealing with their issues. Keeping things inside won't make it any easier. If you two are willing to work with me to break down those walls, I think we'll be able to get to the root of the problem here."

I didn't really hear what Dr. Cross was saying because I had already gone back to that place where I didn't want to be. I was cold and alone. I felt empty and everything was closing in around me. It took everything in me to not cry. There was no way that I was ready to talk about it. I had spent so much time perfecting these walls that I built. Keeping this secret and avoiding the situation was the only thing that kept me sane.

* * *

><p>Kurt and Blaine had finally made their way to Ohio. Their first flight was late taking off, making them miss their second flight. It was another three days before they could find a flight to Ohio. And even though Kurt sounded furious on the phone, I could tell he was happy to be coming home.<p>

"I just hope Blaine doesn't get lost. That man would rather drive around for hours than ask for any help," Kurt said joining me in my living room.

I insisted on Kurt and Blaine staying with us until the next day when we would all drive back to Lima for the first day of rehearsals for the New Directions reunion. I let Blaine use my car to go find some food. He refused to let me cook for them, even though they were my guests.

"That's what the GPS is for. And he better not run out my gas," I chuckled. Kurt was looking around my house in amazement.

"Your house is so beautiful. It's so home-y. Thanks again for letting us stay here," Kurt smiled at me. It was so good to have my best friend back.

"No problem at all, anything for you two. And thanks! You know, the house didn't always look this way," I confessed.

"Really?"

"Yep! After the store re-opened, we invested in renovating the house."

I had always joked with Sam that his inner nerd led him to success. In college, he started writing short stories and novels, and they were amazing. His English professor practically begged him to send his work to publishers and editors when we graduated. But Sam just didn't see how talented he was.

So, being the person that I was, I sent his portfolio without his acknowledgement. Knowing that he would probably kill me, I didn't care. I just had a good feeling about his writing, and I was right.

The phone was ringing off the hook. Everyone wanted to sign deals with Sam. And even though he still wanted to kill me, he was grateful that I had believed in him. After a lot of decisions and deals were made, Sam signed a contract with Tate Publishing in Ohio. It seemed like his career took off over night. After a few years of the life of interviews and book tours, Sam decided to take a break. He wanted to find a new adventure. When he found out that the local comic book store was going out of business in Decatur, he couldn't resist. The next thing I knew, Sam owned a comic book store. And to think at one point, he was ashamed of being a dork.

"Ah yes, the comic book store. Sam was always a dork on the inside," Kurt retorted.

"Ok, enough about us. I want to be updated now! Since when did you want to adopt?" I asked eagerly.

"I had never really thought about kids. Between the both of us, we didn't really have time to settle down with our schedules," Kurt said.

"But then, one weekend Blaine's brother visited us in New York with his new son. And, I don't know. It was something about seeing Blaine with a baby that changed me." I was so happy for Kurt. He deserved this life that he had with Blaine. He deserved to be happy.

"Wow, so is it official? Are you for sure getting the baby," I asked hopefully.

"Well it was a long process. A _very_ long process, I must add. Blaine and I had been rejected so many times; I was ready to give up. But then we got the phone call," Kurt was beaming.

"And she is so precious Mercedes," he said pulling out a photo of an adorable little girl.

"Her name is Leila, and she's Korean. Every time I look at this picture, I get excited over again. It's really happening."

Kurt and Blaine were going to be the best parents, and I couldn't wait to spoil her.

"So, when do you get to pick her up?"

"Well, after this reunion is over, Blaine and I are flying to Atlanta to pick her up!" He exclaimed.

"Oh Kurt, you have to visit us. I want to meet her and buy her everything," I said already forming outfits in my head for Leila.

It was such a happy moment. Kurt had been through so much, and seeing him this happy was incredible. We sat there for a while and he told me about their life in New York. I had planned on telling him about therapy and my recent problems with Sam that day, but it didn't seem fair to ruin the moment.

When Blaine hadn't got back yet, Kurt was for sure he was lost.

"I'm thinking we should call him. Who knows when he'll get back here," Kurt said rolling eyes while pulling out his cell phone.

**A/N: Okay so how's everyone feeling this chapter? I apologize if the way I delivered Sam's career wasn't as strong as it could have been. It was really hard for me to write that part. Anyway, so Sam and Mercedes have made it to therapy, but this girl is just not ready to open up. Also, I've never been to therapy, and I don't know if a therapist would act the way does, but I tried. I wanted to end the chapter happily, so I added the Kurt part at the end. One of my readers said they saw Kurt and Blaine with a Korean baby, and I agree. So that's where Leila comes in :] Alright, so my newest story Now or Never is up, check it out! Reviews are always wanted. ALSO, I really need your help readers. The New Directions will be back next chapter, and I'd love suggestions on what they should be doing now.**

**FINALLY, check out Glee: 100 Story Challenge by StoryBoy, I really love what they're doing with the story and you all should check it out! **


	6. Chapter 6

**Hey readers! Thanks for all of the reviews and comments! I apologize for being horrible at updating. I have just been really busy…busy with being lazy. Seriously, procrastination is actually my name. If you have written a Samcedes fic, I've probably read it in the last week. Heck, if you've written any story on here, I've read it within the last week. I promise to stop being a bum. This chapter is basically a filler, but I felt like it needed to happen. I don't own Glee. I type that with sadness.**

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><p><em><strong>Don't Stop, Believing<strong>_

_**Hold on to that feeling**_

_**Streetlights, people, oh (ah)**_

_**Don't Stop! **_

"That was great everyone, I think we're done for the day," said Finn, who was trying to hide the fact that he was out of breath.

It was our first day of rehearsals for the New Directions reunion, and by the end of the day we were all exhausted. It was worth it though. We were back at the McKinley High Auditorium, the place where our best memories of Glee club originated. Almost everyone had made it back to Lima for the tour.

Finn and Rachel, who had managed to stay together and get married, flew in from Indiana yesterday. Rachel started her career on Broadway, but surprised us all when she took a break to start her life with Finn. They now had twin boys who had just turned 7.

Mike, who had just finished a tour with his dance company, happily came back to help us with choreography. Brittany helped as well. I never understood why she built a career as a TV Personality, but not as a dancer. Either way, she still hadn't lost her skills.

Artie and Tina had both made it, and I was thrilled. I got close with the both of them during college. Tina would always visit me in Chicago, and I always saw Artie when I was visiting Sam at OSU.

Quinn was also there, and she looked like she was taking care of herself. Her smile was more sincere now than it had ever been in high school.

Santana had established a career in fashion, and she was now working on a line for kids. Santana was still Santana, but her designs were amazing.

The only person missing was Zizes, and no one had heard from her in a long time except for Puck. He assured that she sent her love. They didn't stay together after high school, but they remained good friends. Puck was now a father of three and married to his college sweetheart. Looking around at everyone, I would have never guessed this was how we'd turn out. Then again, I never thought we'd be performing together again either.

"Thank God, my aches have aches," complained Santana who was on the floor chugging down water.

"I hate to be the one to say it guys, but we are getting…" Artie started to say it before Kurt him off.

"Oh no you don't. Don't even go there Artie!" Kurt's face was flushed, but he was used to rigorous dance routines.

"He's right Artie. We're not _old_, we're simply fabulous," I said jokingly.

"You guys sounded and looked amazing," said Blaine who was in the audience watching us.

It was such a good day. I loved seeing everyone again. Since I had agreed to go to therapy with Sam, he gave into the reunion. And even though we had to compromise, I could tell he was just as happy to be surrounded by our friends.

"Thanks to Mike and Brittany, our moves look so good," Tina said cheerfully.

"Yea, but thanks to Mike & Brittany, my ass is sore," said Santana, who was now sprawled out on the floor. That girl was a mess.

"C'mon Santana, practice makes perfect. And you know how I feel about perfection." After all of these years, Rachel never lost her motivation to be perfect at _everything_.

"Alright guys, as much as I'd love to sit here in pools of sweat, I'm starving," Puck groaned. I thought it was funny because he still thought he was a bad ass.

"Agreed, how about we head on over to Breadstix?" Sam suggested.

"Breadstix still exists?" questioned Brittany.

"Do we really have to? I'm watching what I eat," Kurt said.

"C'mon bro, it's a tradition," Finn said trying to convince Kurt.

"He's right! We all really need to catch up," said Quinn.

"Fine, but I need to shower, like immediately," which was Kurt's way of compromising.

"Let's all meet up at Breadstix around 8 then," suggested Mike.

Everyone agreed to do so, and I was excited. Over the years, it had been difficult keeping up with the whole group.

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><p>Later on that evening, we were constantly receiving complaints from other customers. We were talking, laughing, singing, and having too much of a good time. Breadstix was a special place for all of us, especially for Sam and I. We had had our first unofficial date here for our "Prom on a Budget".<p>

"Okay, we should probably keep it down before they kick us out," I said giggling.

"Ah Lima, it's still the same old boring place where people don't know how to have fun," said Kurt.

"Speaking of fun, tell us about Broadway Kurt," Tina exclaimed.

"Well, it's been a great journey. Performing is my life, but Blaine and I are actually going to settle down," he said smiling.

"Oh my gosh, does that mean what I think it means?" Rachel asked with so much happiness in her eyes.

"Well, if you think it means Kurt and I are adopting, then you're right," Blaine revealed. Even though I had already known, it was still exciting to talk about. Everyone around the table cheered and congratulated the two.

"Yep, she's an adorable baby girl, and she's Korean," said Kurt who was passing around the picture of Leila.

"Oh, I cannot wait to spoil her with my new line! Auntie Santana can't have the child looking a mess," Santana said.

"I know that's right! But I highly doubt Kurt and Blaine will let her out of the house looking anything less than fantastic," I said laughing.

"Congrats you two, being a parent is the best feeling in world," Sam said squeezing my hand.

"He's right! I love my kids, they're little bad asses in training," Puck said showing us photos of his 3 little girls.

"I still can't believe you won a legit "Father of the Year" award," joked Finn.

"I still can't believe you didn't marry Zizes," Artie chuckled. As cliché as it sounds, we all thought that Puck and Lauren would be together. Their relationship matured during senior year, shocking us all. She brought out the best in Puck.

"Yeah, whatever happened between you two?" Brittany asked.

"Lauren was my best friend, and she taught me a lot about myself, we just weren't meant to be together forever," Puck confessed with a small smile. He had changed the most out of all of us. He would do anything for his daughters.

"Aw, well I wish she could have made it here," Tina said.

"I know, one day we _all_ need to get together," suggested Quinn.

There were murmurs of "Yea" "For sure", and "I agree" going around the table.

"Well let's make the most of it while we're here," Sam said raising his glass.

"Sam's right! I think before everyone has to leave, we should have a party at our house!" I suggested happily. And even though I could tell Sam was staring me down, I chose to ignore it.

"That's a great idea," said Mike.

"Any excuse to dance, I'm there," Brittany was doing her trademark fist pump.

"I don't know if I can dance anymore after today," Santana said rolling her eyes.

We all laughed and enjoyed the rest of the evening together.

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><p>On the way back home, the ride was silent. I could sense Sam was aggravated that I didn't discuss the party with him first. I really didn't want to have this conversation with him, but it had to happen.<p>

"Okay babe, it's just a party. Sorry I didn't talk to you about it first." I was hoping he would let it go. We were both exhausted, and we had been doing so well lately.

"Yea, I know, but I really don't think we should be stressing ourselves out with hosting a party," he replied.

"It's just our friends Sam. We can do this."

When he stayed silent, I knew this was about more than the party.

Hesitantly I asked," Okay, tell me what's up."

He pulled the car over, and I was a little worried. I hated feeling so nervous around him when we had discussions alone.

He sighed and looked at me with his piercing blue eyes.

"I'm beginning to think you're distracting yourself from the real issue," he began.

"It's not just with our friends, in therapy you haven't really opened up."

"Sam, you can't expect me to just open up to a complete stranger so quickly."

"Yea, but I expect for you to try. Mercedes you didn't let me be there for you then, but let me be there for you now. I'm trying so hard, but you've got to give me something baby, _please_."

_The sincerity in his voice made me shiver. What was I doing? I used to be so strong, and on the outside people still believed I was. But on the inside, I was breaking down faster than I could handle. How long could I keep this inside?_

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><p><strong>AN: WOW. That took me forever to write. I hope you all don't want to kill me, I really had trouble thinking of how the members of the Glee club turned out. As much as I wanted to get into the depth of their lives, this is a Samcedes fic, so I want to put most of my energy for them. I just felt like this chapter was needed. So anyway, thoughts, feelings, concerns? Who knew Breadstix was still open, is that how you even spell Breadstix? I just felt like it would look cooler with an "x" ANYWAY, I promise that secrets will be revealed soon. I feel like most of you have a good idea of what happened, I just want to reveal it the best way possible. Alright, well go review like it's your JOB. I'm working on the next chapter of my other story: Now or Never. So go check that out if you haven't! **


	7. Chapter 7

**There is just no excuse, I need to stop procrastinating! Also, someone told me in an anonymous review that my timeline is a little off! **"You have Alexis being 16 and Sam 36. Which means he was 20 when she was born. Thus making Sam (assuming he went straight to college in the fall after high school) actually a college Sophomore. He wouldn't actually graduate for another 2 years." **I went back and edited it, so it should be correct now. Sorry, I have always been horrible with math! Also, anonymous reviewer, no need to be anon! I appreciate all comments and glad you were paying attention :]**

**I do not own Glee.**

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><p>We had been working on the New Directions showcase for weeks now. Our set list was phenomenal. We brought back classics, songs we performed together, and even added some recent music. We were all excited to perform for Mr. Shuester, and we wanted to celebrate his career the right way.<p>

Therapy with Sam had gotten better. I was starting to let my guard down. I still didn't want to reveal too much though.

"Alright, well today, we're going to try something new." We were at another appointment with Dr. Cross. I couldn't possibly imagine any more techniques he had up his sleeve.

"Today, I want to dig a little bit deeper." How was this any different from before? Every appointment, he tried to get me to say things that I wasn't ready to say. Why didn't he ever ask Sam the tough questions?

"I'm going to pick on you today, Sam," he said surprising the both of us. I guess he had read my mind.

"Alright then," he laughed nervously, "ask me anything." Sam was the one that suggested therapy for us, but I realized that this was difficult for him too.

"I want you to think hard about this. I want you tell me the biggest fear you've had about your marriage this far."

Looking at Sam, I knew he was a bit taken aback. I took his hand, trying to tell him "you can do this" with my eyes. Sam had been so supportive of me during all of this. Now it was time for him to _lean on me_. I braced myself for what he had to say. He paused for a moment and then let out a shaky breath.

"I guess I would have to say not being able to protect my family. That's my biggest fear," Sam confessed looking down.

"In what way do you mean?"

"I guess in the means of actually being there for them and protecting them…and financially. I had to watch my father struggle to protect my family. I promised myself that I wouldn't let that happen to my family."

"I see, so how did seeing your father struggle impact your life growing up?"

"I guess it all started during my junior year…"

"_Sam we need to talk to you," my dad said as he came into my room with my mother._

_I was having a pretty shit day. I couldn't pay attention in any class, it was so hard to with my dyslexia. Football practice was anything but easy. Everyone was fighting in the Glee club, as usual. Quinn seemed more distant than usual. I had to watch Stacey and Stevie, which kept from getting all of my homework done. My day was going horribly, and unfortunately it was about to get worse._

"_What's going on?" I dared to ask. My mom looked like she had been crying. _

"_We don't want you to start worrying Sam," he began to say. __**Too late.**__ The awkward silence and the tension was killing me._

"_Well are you going to let me in on what's going on or not?"_

"_**I've lost my job Sam**__." His words hit me like a ton of bricks. Who knew a simple phrase could change your life just like that. How was this true? We moved here for __**this **__job. We left our life back in Tennessee to start a new one in Lima. My dad worked so hard for us. Why was this happening to him?_

_Hesitant and unsure that I wanted to know the answer, I had to ask. "So what's going to happen now?" Both of my parents assured me that everything would be fine. They convinced me that they would both start looking for jobs. __**Everything's going to be fine, Sam. You don't have to worry. **_

_Except that it wasn't going to be fine. Things were okay at first, but as time went by, the situation got worse day by day. Finding a job in Lima proved to be more difficult than my parents imagined. They left early every morning and came back late every evening. It was taking a toll on them. The spirit and happiness they both once had, was slowly slipping away. I almost couldn't recognize them anymore. _

_When we had to start selling our things, we were so far from being fine. Slowly, everything in my room was starting to disappear. One day my Xbox was sold, the next my TV was gone. I didn't mind losing my own stuff, but watching my brother and sister give up their childhood hurt the most. _

_It was starting to affect my personal life. Quinn & I had broken up, but it wasn't like I could afford to take her nice places anyway. And it wasn't like she loved me anyway. I couldn't hang out with my friends anymore. And as much as I wanted to tell everyone what was going on, I didn't want anyone looking at me differently. _

_When I got an after-school job delivering pizzas, it was too late. My parents couldn't make pay the mortgage on the house anymore, and they were already behind 6 months._

_I remember moving into the motel. I wanted to breakdown and cry, but I had to be strong for everyone. That night I couldn't sleep. I could hear my father trying to hold back sobs in the bathroom. He had kept it together until now. At that moment, I decided that I was always going to put my family first. I was going to do anything and everything in my power to help us get out of this mess._

"And did your family ever, 'get out of the mess' as you called it?" Dr. Cross asked.

"It took a while, but my parents did find jobs and they got back on their feet eventually. It wasn't easy, life is never easy. But I was lucky enough to have good friends. Mercedes was always there to help, whether I wanted it or not," Sam laughed looking at me.

Listening to Sam bring up his family's past made me realized how blessed I was again. Throughout our final years at McKinley, he never gave up hope for his family. He worked so hard, and that didn't stop when we started a family.

"So, can you say that because of your parent's struggle, you feel pressure to keep it from happening to your family again?"

"Most definitely, I worry every day. Sure we may be living comfortably now, but anything could happen," He was now facing me with misty eyes, "But it's more than money. I'm supposed to protect you from danger. And when…I failed you Mercedes and I'm so sorry. There isn't one day that I don't beat myself up for not being able to protect you," We both had tear-stained cheeks.

"Oh Sam, you can't do this to yourself. It wasn't your fault." I felt horrible. I never knew how much guilt he had carried. I never let him in; I didn't let him protect me. It wasn't fair that he had to feel this way. It wasn't his fault, it was mine.

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><p>Later that evening, I had gone shopping for the party. After our intense session in therapy, we both agreed that we needed to relax and have fun with our friends. Our reunion show was tomorrow night, and it was almost time for everyone to go home. Time had flown by so fast.<p>

I decided to cook dinner that night for Sam and Alexis. Between working, going to therapy, and New Directions rehearsal, life had been so stressful. We barely had time to spend together as a family.

"Ah, something smells good in here," said Sam as he came into the kitchen. In that moment, he'd wrapped his arms around my waist and laid his head on my shoulder. To an outsider, we looked like a normal couple. I wanted to be normal so bad.

"What happened to you taking a nap mister? We were both pretty drained from the day we had, but I wanted him to get some rest.

"I couldn't really get to sleep. And I couldn't resist the smell of a home cooked meal. "

We were now facing one another. Looking into his eyes, I saw it. I saw the look in his eyes he had when we first got together. It was only there for a little bit, but it was there. Laying my head on his chest, I wanted to forget it all and just stay like this forever. We were silent, but it was a comfortable silence.

"I meant what I said today." Sam randomly said breaking the silence. His eyes were serious and the boyish look in his eyes was gone.

"And I meant what _I _said today." We were both looking at each other, bringing silence upon us again. Our eyes were doing the talking.

I didn't know what came over me, but I couldn't resist kissing him. I mean, I was _really_ kissing him. Both of our hands were roaming and I didn't want it to stop. It was like we were both trying to tell one another "I love you" with our lips.

"Okay seriously? Not in the kitchen, this is where I eat."

We broke apart to see our daughter looking at us in disgust.

"Sorry Lex, we got carried away there," Sam's cheeks were crimson. "Yea I see that…" Alexis' tone dropped. Something about her was very off. Her eyes were red & puffy, and her throat was so raspy, it was if it was swollen. "Are you okay? You don't look so good," I questioned.

"Actually, I was coming down here to tell you that, but then I was scarred for life. Anyway, I don't know if I'll be able to make it to school tomorrow."

I went over to her, putting my hands on her forehead and cheeks. "Well it doesn't look like you have a fever or anything. But you definitely look miserable." Miserable was an understatement. She looked like she had been through _hell_ and back.

"Babe, why don't you clock out early? I'll bring you some medicine and a plate of food in a few." Sam advised her.

"Thanks Dad. Well parents, goodnight. If I don't make it, just know that I always loved you," She was always so dramatic. After Alexis got to her room, Sam busted out laughing like a maniac.

Raising my eyebrow, I questioned my husband's sanity. "Are you insane?"

After struggling to contain his laughter, he managed to composed himself. "Mercedes, we got caught making out by our daughter. The poor girl is probably sicker now than she was," he said laughing again. It was infectious and I couldn't help but laugh either. **Sometimes in life, we all need to take a moment to forget about our troubles and just laugh away the pain. **

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><p><em><strong>AN: Hello, hello! Read & Review, your comments are always welcome! If anyone finds mistakes, don't hesitate to tell me in a review or message! **_

_**So in this chapter, we learn about Sam's biggest fear as a husband & father. Although I'm not a guy, I can understand the pressure to be the "breadwinner" for your family. Even in 2011, we still feel that we have to portray these roles that society has given us. Or better yet, the roles that we have given ourselves to please society. **_

_**After the next chapter, everything will start piecing together! The next chapter will feature the New Directions showcase and the party at the Evans' house. [.com] follow and I'll follow back! Also, I bolded the end of the chapter for a reason. With all of the hardtimes we face, we sometimes forget to laugh. Keep On Smiling. **_


	8. Chapter 8

I feel so bad for neglecting this story! I've been working on other stories and new stories, that I haven't worked on my first born (first story) haha. Anyway, this is a short chapter because it's a transition really, but the next time I update, stuff is about to hit the fan! As always, thanks for reading! This story has the most alerts, subscriptions, and reviews. That means a LOT to me because it was my first story, and I said I'd never post on here. **Anyway, Disclaimer: you already know**.

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><p>The audience in the McKinley High Auditorium was going crazy. It was a full house, and we had sold every ticket. We had just finished <em>Lean on Me<em>, and we could already see Mr. Shuester tearing up in the audience. Some things just never changed. So far, our reunion show had been pretty successful. We began with a roast of Mr. Shue, and that got plenty of laughs. Sue Sylvester had been waiting for an opportunity to make fun of his hair, vests, and butt chin for many years. We were almost at the end of the show, so Finn called Mr. Shuester up on stage.

"We just want to recognize one more time, why we're all here tonight. Many years ago, we won't say how many because I'm sure some of the guys will kill me, but many years ago a man named Will Shuester changed our lives. He believed in a small group of kids, when no one else believed in us. He built a phenomenon. In his career, he's brought home more Nationals trophies for McKinley than anyone. So how about it Mr. Shue, why don't you come up on stage to say a few words and then finish out the show with us?" Everyone in the audience stood on their feet as Mr. Shuester made his way onto the stage. His wife Emma, who had been crying since the beginning of the show, was definitely bawling her eyes out now. Our beloved Glee club director hugged each and every one of us before making his speech. I could tell he had aged since we last saw him, but he still had that same twinkle in his eye.

"Wow, this is all so amazing. I don't want to make this long drawn out speech about how amazing my students are. I mean, look at this," he said as he gestured to the audience, "I remember when we all first began together, we couldn't fill up a row in the audience to see the New Directions perform. Now, we have a sold out show. I'm so honored to have been able to teach you guys. I've had many students over the years, but this group will always be special to me. They taught me a tremendous amount about myself, and about life."

I was crying already. I looked around and felt so blessed to be surrounded by such amazing people. I looked to Sam, he would deny it later, but he was tearing up himself. We had all been through so much together, and we were all so grateful for Mr. Shuester. If it wasn't for him, if he didn't see what he saw in us, none of would have ever met. I would have never met Sam, and I wouldn't have Alexis.

"But enough about me, I think the New Directions have another number in them if I know them correctly," he turned to us and his expression was better than any of us expected. He was full of; well he was full of _Glee_.

"Alright guys, from the top." We finished the show with our classic Don't Stop Believing. The show had been a definitely success, and now we were all in the mood to party.

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><p>So many people showed up to our house for the celebration. It was almost overwhelming, but we had enough space. I was glad that I took precaution and stocked up on food in the house. I was in the kitchen taking a breather from the party when Sam came walking in. He snaked his arm around me and kissed me on the cheek.<p>

"Well, we can safely say the party is a hit. I'm glad you suggested this babe."

"What can I say, I'm always right," I laughed at him. I laughed again to myself thinking about the last time we were in the kitchen together. Alexis had caught us making out, and she was definitely scarred for life. The poor girl had to miss school today because she was still sick. In fact, I hadn't seen her since this morning. She didn't have enough energy to come out to the show either.

"Hey, have you talked to Alexis today? I haven't gotten a chance to check up on her," I questioned Sam. He was busy raiding the fridge for more alcohol.

"Hm, she left a note on the refrigerator door. She said she still wasn't feeling well and that she was going to bed early," he said handing me the note. It was so weird, she never got sick like this and I was starting to get worried. "I should go up and check on her, I'm starting to get worried Sam."

"No no, I'll go check on her. I'll bring her up some more medicine and try to get her to eat. She probably hasn't eaten much today. Stay down here and entertain the guests," he said kissing me again. Sam couldn't resist taking care of his daughter. And even though we both had a great relationship with her, she was definitely a Daddy's girl.

"Okay, alright. Tell her to make sure she takes the medicine. I know how stubborn she is, and she gets it from her father," I told him as I walked off. I was sure he yelled something about her getting it from me too, and I just laughed.

When I joined my friends in the living room, everyone was having a good time. Kurt and Blaine were doing a drunken karaoke rendition of "Hit Me With Your Best Shot." Santana and Brittany were dancing on the tables, and some of the guys were playing drinking games. It's amazing how much alcohol turned us into teenaged idiots again.

"Mercedes come up and sing with us!" Kurt came over and dragged me over to where they were standing. Blaine and Kurt were hilarious when they were drunk, and they were also 10 times more affectionate. Kurt had forgot about me and started to make out with Blaine. I just shook my head. Looking around the party, I felt relieved. It was the first time in a long time that I just pushed all of my worries out of my head and relaxed. Sure enough I would have to deal with my issues one day soon, but it was a great feeling to just not have to worry about anything. I was content with myself, and I finally felt like that I was making personal progress.

Suddenly, I heard a scream from and Sam ran downstairs screaming my name. Everything felt like it was in slow motion. He looked so pale; all of the color was drained from his face. Tears were running down his cheeks, and I felt my heart beating faster by the second. My stomach dropped, nothing good could come of this.

"Sam, calm down! Please, I need to understand what you're saying," I screamed trying to bring him back to reality. He was a blubbering mess, which was freaking me out even more.

"Alexis…she's upstairs…Mercedes, she's unconscious! She won't respond to me!" And with that, my world came crashing down. My one moment of peace and content had been thrown out of the window.

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><p><strong>AN: Wow. So this didn't get exciting until the end. Please don't kill me! I'm sorry this wasn't very well written; I kind of struggled to write it. BUT yes, what do you think could be wrong with Alexis? I don't think you all will guess correctly, but I would love to hear your theories. This story is almost at its end! I'm thinking 3 more chapters, but they'll be longer and worth it. Okay, review, go go go. **


	9. Chapter 9

**So, it's the moment you've all been waiting for. Please brace yourselves and keep Kleenex with you. I feel like a lot of you already knew what happened, but the story will finally be told. I dedicate this chapter to every one of you that has been reading my story so far. I didn't think many people would read this, but a lot of you have been, and for that I am very grateful. Your reviews give me motivation to write. Thank you.**

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><p>Hospitals terrified me. I absolutely hated hospitals; they reminded me of everything. And right now, I didn't need to be reminded of everything. I needed to be strong for Sam. Most importantly, I needed to be strong for Alexis.<p>

As soon as Sam finished his sentence, we rushed upstairs. Alexis was unconscious; her skin cold and clammy. She looked so helpless, and I didn't know what to do. What had happened and why didn't I see this coming?

"_Call 911! We need to get her to the hospital!"_

No matter how much we begged, they only let 1 person ride in the ambulance. After a mild argument, Sam insisted that I go with her.

"_We don't have time to argue, we're losing time. Just go with her, I'll meet you there!"_

Sam and the others all drove to the hospital. When we got there, Alexis was rushed to the emergency room. Unfortunately, I wasn't allowed to be back there with her.

"_She's only 16; I need to be there with her!"_

"_We're sorry Mrs. Evans; we just can't let you back here. We'll update you as soon as we find out what's wrong."_

The entire waiting room was filled with all of our families and friends. Mr. Shuester and Sue Sylvester had even shown up. The support was overwhelming, but I had to keep it together. Sam was pacing back and forth; he was praying to himself. I knew he was cursing himself, but it wasn't his fault. None of us had seen this coming.

After almost 3 hours in the waiting room, we were all getting anxious. None of our questions were getting answered, we were tired, and we just wanted to see Alexis. We just wanted to know she was going to be okay.

All of a sudden, a tall woman with red hair approached us, "Mr. & Mrs. Evans?" All of the hushed whispers and the sniffing of noses were immediately hushed. Everything in the waiting room was silent as Sam and I approached the woman.

"Hi, I'm Dr. Nina Stevens. I'm one of the doctors that tended to Alexis. Would you mind talking with me alone?"

I took Sam's hand and we hurried to the outside hallway of the waiting room. My heart was pounding.

"Dr. Stevens, can you tell us what's going on? Is Alexis going to be okay?" I'm sure my eyes were pleading. I was so desperate to know, we hadn't gotten a single update since we'd arrived.

"Mrs. Evans, Alexis is going to be fine, she's conscious now. But, I'd like to talk to you about the condition that she was in. Now when you got here and explained to the nurses that she had been feeling sick, like maybe she had the flu, we thought it might have been pneumonia. Fortunately and unfortunately, that wasn't the case here. Alexis suffered from Alcohol Poisoning. Alexis fell unconscious naturally due to the amount of alcohol in her system. Thankfully, her central nervous system wasn't damaged. We _did_ have to pump her stomach though. We've done many tests, and there is no sign of brain damage either. We do want to keep her overnight as she is very weak. I _am_ worried about her Blood Alcohol Content percentage. It was at 0.20%, and for her age and size, that's very dangerous. Underage drinking is one of the top causes of death for teens. Do you let Alexis drink at home?" Sam and I looked at one another with our mouths agape; it couldn't have been true. It just couldn't have. Sam was furiously shaking his head as angry tears began to fall.

"What do you mean she had Alcohol Poisoning? My daughter is only 16 years old; she's not old enough to drink! This has to be a mistake! Of course we don't allow her to drink, what kind of parents do you think we are?" He punched the wall in fury. I was still in shock and confusion, and then it all came rushing back to me.

"Dr. Stevens, we would never allow Alexis to drink. But tonight, we did host a party with friends. And there was alcohol in the house. We purchased so much that we wouldn't even notice that any had disappeared. I can assure you that we had no clue that this was happening. In fact, we hadn't communicated with Alexis much all day." Tears were falling from my eyes, how could I have missed it? How could the both of us have missed this?

"I'm sure you're telling the truth. We're not trying to point the finger at anyone here; we're just trying to assert the severity of the situation here. If Alexis had drunk any more than she did; if you had found her any later, the consequences would have been worse."

So many thoughts were in my mind. Why would she do this? Why did she need to drink? If there was something going on in her life, she should have been able to tell us.

Sam looked like he was going to get sick right there in the hallway. The color had yet to return to his face and his body was still trembling. "When will be able to see her? Is she allowed visitors?" His voice was low and raspy.

"Right now, she's only allowed one visitor at a time. Before we left her, she requested to see Mrs. Evans first. I can lead you back there right now if you would like."

"Thank you, I'll be back there as soon as possible. I need a moment with my husband." The doctor smiled and left us alone. As soon as she was gone, Sam slid down the wall and let out his sobs. Rushing by his side, I held him tight.

"This is my fault. I should have locked the cabinet. I should have-"

"Stop it right now! Stop it, it's not your fault Sam, it's not."

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><p>Just when I thought I was all cried out, I proved myself wrong. Alexis looked so fragile and scared. My baby was lying there in a hospital bed, and I had almost lost her again.<p>

"Mom," she croaked out. They had given her plenty of fluids, but she still sounded like she was desperate for water. I wept before her. I was so angry with her; I was angry with myself. But then I was just so blessed that she was still alive.

"Why would you do this to yourself? If you had an issue, you should have _come_ to us. You can tell us anything, you know that. We almost lost you baby girl," I said as she turned away from me. She then turned to me, and her eyes seemed to be filled with hurt and anger. Just like me, she was fighting to keep her tears from falling.

"Oh just like _you_ tell me everything?" Her tone was bitter, and I was confused and taken aback at the same time. "Don't pretend like you don't know what I'm talking about mother."

"What do you mean Alexis," I questioned cautiously. _There's no way she could have known_.

She threw her head back and laughed coldly. I was trying so hard to find the girl I raised. But her eyes and the way she looked at me; I just didn't know who this girl was.

"Today, when I stayed home from school, I decided that I was going to take a bath in you and Dad's bathroom. I don't know what made me want to, I just wanted to. When I went into your room, I just had this feeling. I didn't know where it was coming from, or why I had it. My eyes traveled across your bedroom, and then they stopped at your desk. Walking over, I didn't think I would find anything. I really didn't think I would Mom. I was just being nosey. And then I saw your planner; it was open. Yesterday's date was circled in red. It read, 'Appointment with Dr. Cross.' There was also a business card from an office laying there. I started to get worried. I thought you may be sick or something, so I called the number on the card." She wouldn't even make eye contact with me; she was staring off into the distance as if she was reminiscing the entire scene. On the other hand, my heart was beating faster and faster as she continued to talk.

"There was an automated message when I called. I didn't know whether to be relieved because you weren't sick, or to be pissed because _this_ doctor specialized in marriage counseling. How long were you two going to wait before telling me, huh? I thought you said that everything was going to be okay." She still refused to look at me. If I knew this was going to happen, I would have never kept it a secret from her.

"Listen, we were going to-"

"In the end, I ended up being really angry. I was hurt, and confused, and just really pissed off. So, I started to wonder, 'what else could the possibly be hiding from me?' And then I remembered the room. I walked to the door of the room. You both had always told me to stay away from it; that it was locked for a reason. I knew that you both were hiding something from me, and the answer was behind that door. I picked the lock, and I went into the room."

"Alexis, you didn't…" _This isn't happening. This isn't happening__**.**_

"I did, Mom… I saw _everything_. I saw the unused crib, the mobile, all of the never worn clothes. I saw empty baby books. I saw the sonogram. I saw it all! And then I lost it, because I knew it couldn't be true. I knew that you two couldn't have kept something this serious away from me for almost _17 years_. But then I stopped denying it, and everything started to unravel. Mom, I want the truth. I'm sick of being lied to. I'm sick of being in the dark! I want to know mother… Wh-who, is Jason?"

Everything in the room was about to spin. I wasn't ready for this. I needed Sam for this. She had found out, and almost drank herself to death.

"Lex, I really think your father should be here for this. I can't do this right now," I begged her as my voice quivered.

"No! No more waiting Mom. I've been out of the dark for so long, I deserve to know the truth. Please Mom; _please_ just tell me."

I drew in a long and slow breath. This was it. Even though I hadn't talked about this ever, I remembered the details like it happened yesterday.

"_Sam, can we please stop for the night? I want to get Alexis out of that car seat. And Jason is kicking the hell out of me. He's definitely a night owl, just like his father." I was rubbing my stomach and then I turned around to look at our precious baby girl. She was so peaceful when she was sleeping; I couldn't say the same when she was awake. _

_I was six months pregnant with Jason, and this was our first road trip with him. Alexis had recently turned one, and since Sam's grandparents missed her birthday, we were on our way to visit his family in Tennessee. _

"_Come on baby, if we keep driving tonight, we'll get to my grandparents' house around 3. Then, we'll get to sleep in. Plus, I don't want to have to get up and drive again tomorrow. It'll cut our time short." Even though Sam was focused on the road, he could tell that I was pouting._

"_Oh don't you start pouting, I think that if we continue to drive, we'll make it in record time. We'll be there before you know it." Sam had already gotten us lost twice, and I was starting to question if he ever lived in Tennessee or knew how to get there._

"_Please? I'm exhausted. And hey, Jason seems like he finally wants to stop kicking me. I want this opportunity to sleep. And I know you're tired too. Besides, once we get the little one tucked away, we can cuddle. I know how much you like to cuddle Sam," I said trying my best to persuade him. I knew I was wrong by teasing him, but I couldn't stand being in that car any longer._

_That familiar lopsided grin spread across his face; I knew victory was mine. "Fine, we'll stop at the next place we see. But we're getting up bright and early to get back on the interstate. I want to beat traffic."_

_It was a few more miles until we found a hotel. It didn't look like it was in the best part of town, but we were both so tired. We just wanted to get some sleep. After we were settled down into the hotel, I heard Sam's stomach grumble._

"_Oh my goodness, that sounded like a lion roaring," I laughed walking over to him. _

_"Yea, we ate so long ago. I think I'm going to go and see if anything's open." _

_I just laughed again. Sam constantly needed food; I was surprised he had made it this long without eating. _

_"Keep the door locked, and don't answer it for anyone, okay? I'll be back as soon as I can," he said placing his hands on my very pregnant stomach while kissing me on my forehead._

"_Yes, father. Now go and get your food. I'll be fine here."_

_Before I knew it, I had drifted asleep. I woke up suddenly, and Sam still hadn't got back. I got up to use the restroom while bringing my phone with me. I dialed his number, and it went straight to voicemail._

"_Hey, where did you go? Actually, nevermind. I think I hear you coming in now." I heard the door open._

"_Where did you go that took that long…?" I almost choked on my words. Standing before me were three men, and none of them were my husband. I began to panic inside my mind, but I wasn't going to show them I was scared. _

"_I'm sorry, I think you all have the wrong room," I said trying to breathe. I didn't understand how they'd gotten in. I locked the door, I was sure of it. Where was Sam? "I'd like you to leave, my husband should be back soon."_

_They all rushed me and I hit the ground. They started kicking and punching me over and over again. I cried out in horror, the pain was excruciating. _

"_Please, please stop. I have a baby girl. I'm pregnant, please!" My cries were desperate. I prayed that somehow they'd stop. I prayed that Sam would come back and save me. I could only think about Alexis and Jason. I could only pray that he'd be okay. My thoughts started become cloudy and after that everything went dark. _

"Mom…oh my God Mom," Alexis had tears slowly falling down her face. I didn't know if she still wanted to know the truth, but I couldn't turn back now. My walls were quickly tumbling down, and they couldn't be rebuilt.

"When I woke up, there was nothing I could do. I had lost Jason." When I was telling the story, I felt like I had been telling someone else's story. I had pushed it away for so long that I didn't want to believe it happened to me. I refused to go to therapy when it happened. Sam begged me, he pleaded that we saw someone. But I didn't want it. I didn't want to talk to people, I didn't want to feel weak, I didn't want people to feel sorry for me, and I didn't want to believe that my son was gone.

"What ever happened to Dad? Where was he that night?" I sighed, my eyes welling up again.

"Your father, after he had left to find food, those men had jumped him in the parking lot when he was coming back to the hotel. They took his hotel key, and that's how they got inside. Apparently, they just wanted to rob Sam. They didn't know we were going to be in the hotel room. One guy was holding your dad at gunpoint in the parking lot. He risked his life and lunged towards the guy holding the gun. If he didn't…I might have lost you too."

I didn't feel relieved after opening up to Alexis. I guess I was supposed to, but now there was a heavy feeling on my heart. Thoughts of that night flooded my mind. Thought of Jason made me feel weak. Everything about that night that I wanted to forget was all rushing back to haunt me. Now, there were going to be many more discussions. Questions were going to continue to be asked, and this was just the beginning.

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><p><strong>AN: So this is definitely just the beginning of this conversation, but now you all know what happened. I tried to do this chapter some justice by researching, but just know that everyone's situation is different. If you have personally lost anyone; if you know anyone that has lost someone, especially their child, my heart is with you and them. Thank you again readers. I really want your reviews this time. Even if you just want to be anonymous, your words are always appreciated.**


	10. Chapter 10

_My goodness, I'm so sorry for not updating sooner! If you've been reading my other story Bluebird, you'll know that I've been updating that frequently. I honestly got myself caught up and juggling three stories is very difficult. I do this thing where I think I can accomplish everything at once and then things start to go crazy. I'm trying to slow down though and I thought I'd give some love to this story so I can finally finish it! Including this one, there should be two chapters left. Thanks again everyone for reading, reviewing, and being so patient with me._

_Disclaimer: I like ribs, but I'm in no way affiliated with RIB. So nope, no ownership here._

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><p>Everything was out in the open. Within the 10 minutes that I had entered her hospital room, there were no more secrets left between my daughter and I. Alexis had found out about the tragic mess that was and is still is her family. As she kept asking me questions, I wanted so badly to be able to hold Sam's hand. Not once since it happened did I want to lean on him. The strong, independent woman reputation that I had rightfully obtained over the years would not be ruined. I tried so desperately to convince myself that I would be okay, which led me to push him away. But now, I needed him more than ever. I needed him to hold me tightly in his arms so I could listen to his heartbeat. His arms would be the protection that I needed. The soft thumping of his heart would remind me of the love that he has for me. The combination of those two would be enough to give me the strength. It would give me the confirmation that indeed someday, everything would be alright.<p>

He was still out in the waiting room, totally oblivious to what was happening. I knew Sam in and out; I had no doubt that he was worrying himself to death.

"You know, your father is worried sick about you. He was the one that found you upstairs. I haven't seen him so horrified since…" my voice trailed off as I pictured Sam's face on that day. My heart broke as I remembered the words he told me as I laid in my bed at the hospital. He thought I was sleep, so I pretended to be, but I heard every word. _"My __**one**__ duty in life as a husband and father is to protect my family from any harm. I made a promise to you baby, and I broke it. I'm so sorry Mercedes, I'm so sorry that I couldn't protect you this time." _He would never forgive himself, and now with everything that was happening, the guilt was probably piling on him in layers.

As I looked down at Alexis, tears were filling her eyes. She needed me right now; she needed the _both_ of us. I smoothed down her curly hair and placed a kiss on her forehead.

"Shh, baby girl, don't cry. We're all going to get through this together," I said trying to reassure her. She shook her head violently as more tears rolled down her face.

"I just feel so bad, Mom. And Dad's probably so disappointed in me." Taking a Kleenex, I wiped her eyes and smiled down at her. She was such a Daddy's girl and even if she never admitted it, his opinion of her was something that she valued deeply.

"Your father loves you, and he knows that nobody's perfect. If anything, all of this will only strengthen the bond of this family. You got that?" She nodded her head, but her lip was still quivering.

"I just wish that I could have gone about this another way, but I felt so alone. It was like, even if I did talk to someone, they would never understand how I was feeling. I wasn't ready to get the looks of sympathy from my friends and I'm still not. No one can understand this." I was taken aback at the words that came out of my daughter's mouth. Everyone in her world that she faces after this will look at her with sympathetic eyes, pat her on the back, give her greeting card advice, but they'll never truly understand. I drew in a sharp breath as I looked down at Alexis and saw myself in her. I knew what it was like to feel alone, and I didn't want her to feel that way ever again.

"Well, you're right about your friends. They might not understand now, but if you give them time and let them in, it'll be easier for the both of you. And your father and I might not understand exactly how you're feeling, but we've been there. Lex, we're still there. But the next time, we need to work things out together. Don't be afraid the next time. Not everyone is going to understand, but as long as you have us, someone will always be there to listen," I said grasping my daughter's hand. I was talking to her, but I was definitely advising myself at the same time. I, Mercedes Evans, needed to take the advice that she was dishing out.

I hugged her one last time. I figured it was time to go and retrieve Sam so that he could finally see her.

"I love you, Mom." I closed my eyes and smiled. My little girl wasn't so little anymore. We had to protect her, yes, but it was time for us to stop being so fragile with her. She was stronger than any of us had imagined.

"I love _you, _Alexis. I'll go get your Dad so he can see you." She smiled genuinely and for a minute I saw the sparkle in her again that Sam and I both loved and adored.

As I left her room, I was still worried about what the future would bring. I didn't know what any of this meant, but it was only the beginning for our family, I knew that much.

Walking through the double doors that led back to the waiting room, I was bombarded questions.

"Is everything alright?"

"How's Alexis?"

"What did the doctors say?"

Everyone was frantic and worrisome, but I could only focus on Sam who had immediately run to my side. I wrapped his arms around my waist and laid my head upon his chest.

"She's good Sam, she's good," I whispered. He looked down at me with questioning eyes, and I just nodded my head. I let myself go from him for a little while to face everyone. Our friends and family surrounded us, and I was overwhelmed with the love that had filled the room. I was truly blessed to still have so many wonderful people in my life after not letting them in for so many years.

"Everyone, she's going to be fine," I said calling out to them. They still didn't know the exact details, but this news was a relief to all, and they didn't ask much more questions.

I led Sam back out of the waiting room into the hallway and hugged him again. I didn't want to let go. I held him so tightly. I was trying to put all of what I had into that one hug. He held me back just as strong, and I could tell he was trying to do the same. I would never be able to tell him how much I loved him, how much I was sorry for not letting him be there for me when he wanted to, or how lucky I was to have him as my beautiful husband and father to Alexis. There weren't enough words or tears in the world to express what we were feeling, but for right now this embrace was enough.

"Sam, she knows," I said finally breaking our hold. He figured it out by the look in my eyes. He let out a deep breath and pushed his blonde locks away from his forehead.

"Everything?" I nodded to answer his question. For a moment, we just stared at one another. I could read him so well; I knew about a million thoughts were running through his mind. Everything about that day was playing through his mind again and again.

"Don't do it, Sam. She needs you right now. I know what you're thinking, just don't."

"I know baby, but the last time we were in a hospital…I…just can't help it. That's my daughter in there."

"And she needs you, so go in there and be her hero. We can't change the past, but we can do something about now."

I let the words sink in. _**We can't change the past, but we can do something about now.**_

"Come here," he said taking me in his arms again. "Mrs. Evans, I love you."

"I love you too, Mr. Evans. Now go see your daughter. Room 332," I said pointing down the hall. After one quick kiss, he practically sprinted down the hallway. I smiled on the inside thinking about the man that I married; had given me everything and so much more.

When I made it back to the waiting room, it was a lot more cheerful. Everyone was still there, and the crowd seemed to have grown bigger. I was almost taken to the ground as I was tackled with a hug by my 26 year old brother-in-law. Stevie, who had insisted on being called Steven ever since turning 15, was a spinning image of his older brother. Steven was now living in Boston with his fiancé. They moved there together after both finishing graduate school. The small brunette girl by his side, Karen, hugged me tightly after him. They were such an odd couple; complete opposites, but it worked.

"I'm so sorry we couldn't get here sooner MJ. As soon as Sammy called, we left as soon as we could," he said looking down and me with his piercing green eyes. I still looked at Steven as the little boy I used to read to in the motel room. He had grown up so fast before our eyes. I thought it was funny he still called me MJ, especially since my initials were ME now. He had heard Tina call me that nickname once and adopted it for himself. I asked him one day why he still called me that, and he answered with, "why would I call you ME? It sounds ridiculous."

"It's okay, she's fine! She's fine. I'm glad you two could make it," I said hugging them both again.

"Stacey is trying to find a flight so that she can get here to see Alexis," Karen spoke up. Stacey was now 25 and living in California pursuing her career in photography. Sam wasn't too happy when she took a leave from school after her first year in college to "find her calling." She might have been taking a crazy risk, but she was following her dreams. And for that, I would always admire her.

"Can we see her now?" Steven was probably the most attached to Alexis. She was his first and only niece; and he definitely spoiled her because of it.

"There's a stupid rule about only one person can be in the room at one time, but for you, I'll see what strings I can pull." He smiled at me and took Karen's hand and rejoined his parents.

Puck ran up to me with his wife and three girls and I couldn't help but smile. Nicole, 14, Amy, 11, and Eden, 6, all gave me a hug. They all had his eyes, but took after Pam's good looks. She could have stepped out of a magazine with her tall frame, tan skin, and dark hair. She was good for Puck, and only changed him for the better.

"I called Zizes and she sends her love. She wishes she could be here with all of us. We're going to take the girls home so they can get some rest, you tell little mama to hang in there. You call us if you or Sam need _anything._" he said embracing me.

"I made Lex a card so she can feel better," the adorable six year-old said as she handed me a folded piece of paper with dozens of crayon hearts on it. My heart swelled; Puck and his wife had done an amazing job raising their children. I was so proud to call him my friend.

After they left, I went over to join my parents who were sitting with Kurt and Blaine. Kurt was showing the picture of Leila to my dad while Blaine and my mom were having a discussion about the adoption process. When I approached them, they looked up at me and smiled.

"You all having fun together?" I asked as I took the seat across from them.

"We'd be having more fun if the circumstances were different. How's my grandbaby?" My dad asked. If there was any man that was almost as protective over Alexis than Sam, it was definitely my father.

"She's doing fine. She's still a little weak though," I paused considering if I should tell them the truth. There already so much that they didn't know, I didn't want to keep them in the dark any longer.

"You guys, Alexis had alcohol poisoning. We were lucky that Sam found her when he did, it could have been much worse." My parents eyes practically fell out and Kurt and Blaine looked pretty shocked. There were so many unanswered questions; I didn't know where to begin.

"But, how…why?" Kurt was in disbelief. My mom let a single tear fall from her eye as my Dad held her tight.

"It's a _very_ long story. But, it's not what you think. The good thing is, is that she's okay right now. That's what we need to be thankful for. We'll deal with everything later, but as of now, we all need to be thanking God." My mother smiled and Blaine took my hand.

"Well, Santana and I have a shopping spree planned for her and Leila. We were thinking about having you, Sam, and Lex come with us when we go pick her up! If Alexis is up to it, how does that sound?"

I looked at my best friend of almost twenty years and smiled brightly.

"I think that sounds very lovely."

Looking around the room, a pang of sadness hit me. I wished so much that Jason could have met all of these wonderful people. Jason would have loved his grandparents. Both Sam's and my parents were so loving of their grandchildren.

Kurt and Blaine would have been the ultimate godparents to him. Taking him on excellent trips to New York to go sightseeing and opening his eyes to different cultures.

Finn and Rachel would send him birthday gifts and random post cards, as they do with Alexis. Santana would surprise him with his favorite things on Christmas every year. Brittany and Mike would teach him how to dance and Tina would help him "be the best Jason he could be."

Artie would teach him how to play chess and Quinn would cook him tasty meals when she visited. His Uncle Steven would have loved him unconditionally, no matter what mistakes he made.

Sam would have loved his first and only son with all of his heart, teaching him about life, sports, and girls. As his mother, I would have held his hand from the moment he was born until the moment he left my nest to live on his own.

Alexis' words kept ringing through my thoughts. _**I felt so alone**_. She didn't have to be alone through this, and neither did I. And then suddenly, my heart didn't hurt as much anymore. The pain would never go away, and we still had our issues to deal with. But Jason wouldn't have wanted me to live life so guarded. I thought about that room, his nursery. I had always been afraid to take out the stuff because I didn't want to forget him, but as long as I lived, Jason would always be with us. He would always and forever be a part of our lives, making us stronger each and every day.

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><p><strong>AN: I paused from writing to actually begin writing this Author's Note. I kind of had this Joey Lawrence WHOA moment as I was writing. _Mercedes Evans_. OMFG. It gave me chills. I mean, of course I know that they're married in my story haha, but I don't think I've ever written Mercedes Evans out that way. It kind of just…threw me off.**

**Okay, I'm finishing this note as I have completed the chapter. IT TOOK FOREVER FOR ME TO WRITE. It's not that long, but I procrastinated hardcore with this chapter. I'm correcting myself by telling you all that now there will be two more chapters. I hope you guys don't think I'm cutting this story short, it was always meant to be this short and end a certain way. I don't know** **about a sequel just yet or anything, but I do want to continue for writing for Alexis Evans one day.**

**But anyway, leave your reviews! I'll be lucky if you guys even remember this story and will want to read it haha.**


	11. Not a Chapter Author's Note

**Hey everyone! This isn't an update, it's just an Author's Note. I hope that you love me enough to read it. Make sure that if you have a comment on this, send me a message. Don't review the chapter :)**

**I understand that FF hates it when people do this, but it was needed. At the beginning of the summer, How Did I Get Here was my first and only Samcedes story. I got carried away and thought I was Superwoman. Unfortunately, I am not.**

**I have no interest in discontinuing this story or any of the others. All I can do is take it one day at a time, and hope all of you beautiful readers will understand. So How Did I Get Here and Now or Never are _officially on hiatus._ They were on hiatus unofficially, but I felt the need to address you all.**

**Summer is almost over for me, and that makes me extremely sad. This summer is one that I will never forget. I never thought I'd put myself out there and put my writing on FF! And even though I'm extremely excited to get back to school, and out my parents' house, I'm going to miss summertime. I am excited to get back and take a Creative Writing next semester.**

**I'm so proud of the Samcedian community! Even with the recent news of Chord's departure, we've bound together and have stayed strong. We should be proud and happy for him, even if our Samcedes hearts are still sad. We will always have Samcedes through Fanfiction!**

**Speaking of, some of you are phenomenal writers. Please, please keep it up! I read your fics, and I'm completely blown away. I'm so blessed for so many of you to have found my story and actually enjoy it.**

**As far as when these two fics will be updated again, I can't promise anything soon. But don't worry, five years from now, you won't get an email from FF saying "Update from keeponsmilingg. Chapter 11 of How Did We Get Here! Finally" Just be patient with me!**

**One more thing, make sure all of you go out and support Glee Live in 3D! Unless you actually saw the concert live… Actually, if you saw it live, go see it again. I can't wait for it.**

**Love you all! So much!**

**I am on Tumblr! So follow me if you'd like, I follow back!**

**-keeponsmilingg**


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